That little face. That is the face that I have to drop off at daycare Monday through Friday and then proceed to spend almost 9 hours away from. *tears* I was extremely blessed to get 4 months of maternity leave. Extremely blessed. In those 4 months, I can honestly say that I adored every second of it. I knew going back to work was going to be hard, but I didn't think it would be this hard. That first day, I was a wreck. I admit it. The whole first week was pretty hard. It's gotten better now that we're in the swing of things and a regular routine, but I'll admit Sunday nights are still hard. After I nurse Dayton and put him to bed I start to get sad about having to start yet another week of work. Sigh, such is life. I know lots of mamas go through this.
Hopefully, some day I will be able to at a minimum be a stay-at-home/part-time working mama. But until then, I just have to deal with my mama guilt. I wish I could be at home with my baby (and future babies). I also know that I'm a good mama (at least I think so) and by working we can give Dayton a lot of extra things or experiences. Maybe some day I will get to stay at home. Till then, I just have to give that mama guilt over to God and let Him take over.
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