Colton's Dedication

Colton's baby dedication was a special day for us. It was a special day for a couple of reasons. One is that our faith is incredibly important to us and this day is an important way for us to demonstrate our faith. Two, we also dedicated Dayton so being able to dedicate Colton as well was another step in our walk with God. Third, our friends and family were planning to attend and be with us.

In our faith, we do not believe in baptizing babies. We believe that baptism is an outward show of your faith in God. When Dayton and Colton decide to cross over the faith line and accept Jesus as their living Savior, then they can make the decision on their own to be publicly baptized. Until then, a child dedication is our outward declaration to raise our children in the church and help guide them to finding Jesus on their own.

When we dedicated Dayton, we had family friends that dedicated their babies as well. It was fun to be able to participate in this together. This time around, we had three other family friends that were dedicating their babies as well. It was very special to have the opportunity to dedicate all of our babies together.

Our dedication verse for Colton was 1 Samuel 12:24 - "But be sure to fear the Lord and serve Him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things He has done for you."

Stella (8 months), Colton (10 weeks), Maggie (6 weeks), Grace (6 weeks)

Keeping Your Vow, Week 3

Here are my notes for Week 2 of our churches series, Keep Your Vow. My original post with Week 1 can be found here!

Week Three - Never Give Up

Never giving up means - working as hard as you can to protect and preserve your marriage.

1 - Be empowered by God and not feelings and circumstances.

• control - we cannot control our marriage, God has to empower us.
• Ephesians 5:20-27
• vs. 18 - "influenced" by the Spirit
• marriage is about holiness, not happiness
• How do we let God empower our marriage? Follow Jesus. Surrender daily. Ask for help.

2 - Forgive completely (Put the rock down).

• Matthew 6:14-15
• forgiveness = costly sacrifice. Forgiveness is not about them, it's about you. Forgiveness is not trust. 
• Four steps to forgiveness: 1) believe the gospel, 2) trust God, 3)let go of power and control, 4) push past fear.

3 - Think 100%, not 50/50.

• Marriage is about what you can give (100%), not what you can get (50/50).
• Marriage is about sacrifice.
• Philippians 2:3-4

4 - Surround yourself with friends who never wan you or themselves to give up too.

Keeping Your Vow, Week 2

Here are my notes for Week 2 of our churches series, Keep Your Vow. My original post with Week 1 can be found here!

Week Two - Stay Loyal

Staying loyal means we pursue the One (God) with the two (you and your spouse).

Loyalty is about the priorities of our lives. If you don't pursue God, you won't pursue your spouse.

1. God
2. spouse
3. children
4. work
5. friends, hobbies

Idolatry - putting anything before God. (Exodus 20:1-6)

• Our God is a jealous God. We should not worship created things.
• Disloyalty begins in the heart.
• Ezekiel 14:1-5
• God listens even when your walking/running away from Him.

What happens when...

• you put your spouse first? Your spouse will crumble under the pressure of expectations.
• when God is first but other things come second? You will neglect your spouse.
• when children become first? The pressure may break the kids or after the kids leave the marriage may fail.
• when work comes first? The whole family unit will crumble. 

Keeping Your Vow, Week 1

photo by GetzCreative from our wedding on 08.18.12

During May, our church did a series called Keeping Your Vow. It was a three week series and it was really, really good! The series gave easy, practical advice that you can start using right away and is worth watching for everyone. We loved it!

Listening to the series made me stop and reflect on our marriage. We've been married almost three years now. I know that doesn't sound like a long time, but we have already been through so much - ups and downs, job loss, a move, starting a new life in a new place, leaving home, new jobs, major job changes, crazy exes (on both sides), first year of marriage changes, infertility, first year of baby, and all of the every day issues that any marriage goes through. As I sat here writing all of those things down, it made me happy that those aren't the things I think of when I reflect on my marriage. They are the things that God has used to make our marriage strong. We have a good marriage. I know that only comes from God and I am so, so thankful for it.

While we were dating, Brad and I both made the decision to dedicate our relationship to God. We knew that if each of us drew closer to God on our own by putting God first then we would draw closer to each other. This has proved true in everything that we do. The closer we are to God, the closer we are to each other. Watching some of my closest friends and family go through a divorce is so hard and it makes me even more thankful for the relationship that we have. I pray each day that God will protect and preserve our marriage.

I did take some notes throughout the series and I wanted to share them here, along with the videos from the sermon series. I encourage everyone in a relationship - happy or hurting - to watch this series. I promise, you won't regret it!

Click on the message title to view the message! You can find my notes and the message on week two (here) and week three (here).

Message 1 - Fight Fair

What is marriage?

• Marriage is a covenant, not a contract. It is a promise between a man, woman, and God. It is fused together by God. A contract is an agreement based on mutual distrust.
• Marriage is two becoming one. Marriage is two people who cleave together and become one flesh. Two people are united together as one. Two people united spiritually, emotionally, and physically. 
• Marriage is a picture of the gospel. We are far worse than we know, but God's grace covers us. Our love should demonstrate the love of God. 

Healthy couples fight for fair for understanding. Unhealthy couples fight dirty to win. 

• We're all sinners. You married a sinner.
• You can get bitter or you can get better.
• We were never taught how to fight fair. 

Ways to Fight Fair:

• Listen carefully - Seek first to understand, then be understood. Sit down. Reflect each other's statements. Listen for unmet expectations. Listen and identify emotions. The greatest gift you can give your spouse is to understand and validate their emotions. 
• Choose words wisely - Be slow to speak (Prov. 21:23). Ask, "Should I say this? Should I say this now?" Never - call names, raise your voice, never threaten, get historical, say never or always, say "divorce," quote your pastor (to prove your point). 
• Manage anger righteously - James 4. Don't go to bed mad. Don't give the devil a foothold. Understand where your (or his/her) anger is coming from, find the underlying emotion. 

God is on our side. He is eager to bless and give strength to your marriage!

Dayton's Dedication

Finally! Dayton was supposed to be dedicated at our church last September, but the morning of the service Dayton had a fever. A high fever. We tried to get it down, but we couldn't. My mama intuition was telling me that something wasn't right, so off to the ER we went. Dayton ended up being admitted into the pediatric unit with the beginning stages of pneumonia. That was a scary weekend. Thankfully, he got the care he needed at the right time and he was much better a few days later.

So, now it was time to try again! Dayton's dedication is probably the most important thing we have done in his life thus far. His dedication was not only for us to dedicate him to our Lord and Savior, but it was also a time for Brad and I to dedicate ourselves to God to bring Dayton up in a Jesus-centered home. The most important thing we can do as parents is to live-out God's grace in our lives and pray that Dayton accepts Jesus as his Savior as well. That is our prayer. That is our purpose as parents. We want to show Jesus' light in our lives so that others come to know Him as well. This was a big day for all three of us!

Our church, Prairie Lakes Community Church, holds a baby Child Dedication service for many parents at 3:30 pm in the chapel of the church. It is an intimate service that allows families to come together and celebrate another precious life. Since we're a "B" name, we were second to go up on stage. We read our "future hope" for Dayton and Brad read the verse that we had picked out for Dayton. It is the verse I have prayed over Dayton since we found out that we were pregnant. Then Pastor Gabe and Ellen (head of the children's ministry) prayed over us, along with everyone in the audience. Our close friends dedicated their daughter that day as well, so it was extra special. We had some family and our close friends attend in support. It was a beautiful day and I am so glad that we were finally able to do it! We love you baby boy.

 

Forgiveness

"Forgiveness...Is more than saying sorry..."

I've been ruined. Anyone else hear that whack song from Just Friends when they hear the word, forgiveness?? No? Just me? Okay...so anyways...

This past Wednesday, one of the girls on my team invited the rest of us to her church's ladies Bible study. The message was on forgiveness and due to previous circumstances, we all felt like this would be a good one to attend. (No, we didn't need to forgive each other - we all are very close friends.) Besides, there is always someone who is going to hurt us and who doesn't need some encouragement on forgiveness? And to top it off, we decided going out for margs and a girls night was the best way to spend some time together before the new school year started. I love my team.

The Bible study started out with the pastor's wife and the music leader singing a funny parody of Simon and Garfunkel's "Sound of Silence." The re-written lyrics were about a husband and wife fighting and trying to say the magic 8 words..."I was wrong, will you please forgive me." So. funny. The speaker for the night was an elderly pastor, whose wife of 56 years, was also in the audience. Pastor Nesbit had a very hard childhood, which he shared with us. He was one of 11 children that grew up with an alcoholic and abusive father. His story was terrible, but he has learned to forgive. Here are some of the points that I took away from the message ~

• What is the purpose of your life? To know God through Jesus and become like Jesus.
• What does God use to motivate you to that goal? God uses all things. (Romans 8:28)
• What does God give you to help you towards that goal? GRACE
• justifying grace - just as if I had never sinned
• sanctifying grace - God giving you the desire and the power to respond like Jesus no matter what happens.

• If you don't know how to deal with hurt, it will turn into bitterness.
• What happens to you is never your problem - how you respond is your problem.
• Forgiveness is not a feeling, it's a choice. 
• When Jesus told Peter to forgive 70x7 times. 
• Someone may not hurt you 490 times, but every time you think of that one hurt you can chose to forgive them.
•  Hurt people, hurt people.

These were the points that stuck out to me. Good reminders!

Book Review - "Girl Talk"

This book. Love it! Jen Hatmaker is one of my new favorite authors. She is a strong Christian woman who is funny, real, and open. It is so refreshing! In early Spring, a lady from my church (and fellow southerner!) asked about interest in a ladies Bible Study over the summer. Me and several of the girls from our church small group showed interest, as well as about 30 other ladies! Dana organized the study and hosts all of us on either Wednesdays or Fridays. God has truly gifted Dana in hosting and leading. 

Wednesday group!

 As soon as I opened this book and read the first few pages, I knew it was just what I needed. "Girl Talk!" is about women and their friendships. As women, we are relationally driven (duh). Jen explains why God built us this way, why community is so important, and how to foster healthy relationships with your girl friends.

We are about 3 weeks into the study and I have loved every week so far. Each of the 5 chapters is broken into 5 days. Jen asks the reader to spend at least 15 minutes per 5 days on the devotional and studying God's Word. The chapters include content such as God's purpose in friendships, being truthful to yourself and God, kinds of friends, gossip, and friendship builders. Each page I read, I find myself saying, "Yeesss!."

One of the things that has stuck out the most to me, is the need to be real. Dana and I share this experience, but in the south there is this underlying culture of "making it pretty." If that's not enough, social media makes it worse! We don't live in a perfect world people. Lets.be.real. Real problems, real friendships, and real life. Like I said, it is refreshing! Which bring me to this piece in the book - there is no place for fake.

"He would prefer an honest mess over a pretty lie every day of the week." I'm a Christian and I'm a mess. See what I mean?? Yeeessss! So now, I'm taking this mess and working on building strong, Christian friendships. Do I have girl friends? Yes, yes I do. and I love them all. I/we are taking these friendships and making them even better. I love my girls and God has blessed us with such an amazing group of people to do life with. I think every woman can benefit from this book! It's a must read.

He's Not Ours, Lord...He's Yours

This photo was taken by Karen, at Moxie Design. When I saw the photo, I knew exactly what I wanted to do with it - add this verse. It was something we prayed and still pray for our son.

My Thoughts this Thursday

I know, the title is cheesy...but I saw this today and it has been on my mind since I read it (it just happens to be Thursday). The quote stuck in my thoughts and is a perfect reminder for me right now and in the future.

Hope

Some days you just need a little encouragement... God is God and God is always good. My faith is everything that I have. No matter what I/we have been through, God has always carried me/us through! My trust is in Him!

"Quiet"...

Brad and I have been visiting churches here in CF. We loved our home church, North Hills Community Church,  in Greenville so much that it has been kind of hard to find a "home" here. We have visited 2 churches so far and are trying to find a church where we can be actively involved.

This past Sunday, we visited Prairie Lakes Church. The building was very large, but when we went inside it felt more familiar. The music was wonderful and we really enjoyed the preaching. Since we have only been once, we plan to visit there several more times to learn more about the church.

The message that day was titled, "Quiet: Turn it Off and Turn it Down." The point of the message (which was amazing) was to "remove distractions so you can here the voice of God" and also, "allow yourself to slow down and tune-in ti what God is saying and doing in your life and others."

Wow did we need this! During the past 6 months...our life has been crazy!! It was so refreshing to listen to someone tell us to slow down and just listen. God's got this...we just need to be quiet enough to hear what He is telling us.

Here are my notes:

1. God is always speaking.

• God is the beginning and the end.
• God speaks in different ways: 1) through His Word, 2) through others, 3) through life circumstances.
• "Is my life quiet enough to hear God's speaking?"

2. Our lives are too noisy.

• Our lives are noisy because of:  
• technology, sin, toxic emotions (worry, guilt, bitterness), responsibilities, finances, etc.

3. Only God can satisfy.

•  The problem is our hearts.

4. All of us need quiet...Quiet is a necessary as breathing.

• Jesus was the example: He withdrew from the crowds to the wilderness to quiet.
• God knows what you need in your quiet moment.
• Matt 4:18-20 ~ a clear call to the disciples
• Matt 14:22-29 ~ Peter walks on water
• Matt 16:21 ~ Peter is out of focus
• Matt 26:69-75 ~ Peter denies Jesus - he was afraid of being crucified
• Acts 2 & 3 ~ a quiet Peter

Food for Thought: "How many times do we deny Jesus by the things we say and do?